Chapter 21

That night Jaimee was back at the Hansons' house in the brothers room. Everyone was asleep but her. She was to curious about the Taylor wanting to get to know Alona situation. It had nothing to do with jealousy, just anxiety. Even though Alona and her weren't very close anymore, she worried for her. What if Taylor used her? What if he led her on and broke her heart? Alona would be devastated. By seeing how Taylor really acts not only surprised Jaimee but terrified her. He probably gave hundreds of girls diseases or got them pregnant. Jaimee just didn't want Alona to deal with that. She had to stop any contact between the two before things got out of hand. Only question was how. Pushing away her thoughts, Jaimee stood up off of the uncomfortable mattress. She decided to get a glass of water. Tip toeing down the stairs she saw that the kitchen light was already on. Looks like someone had the same idea. When Jaimee got to the kitchen she stopped suddenly. For some reason her heart was jumping leaps when she saw Taylor sitting at the table wearing nothing but a pair of black boxers. His beach blonde, velvety hair was pulled back into a tail. She hated to notice, but he was hot.


"Oh, hey stalker" Taylor looked up from his tumbler of orange juice.


Jaimee nervously smiled. Hey. She meekly greeted him. She hoped she wasn't blushing but knew she was. "What are you doing?"


"Just thinking."


Jaimee took a seat across the table from him. The kitchen was dim but she could see every detail of his face -- and body. She couldn't believe that Taylor Hanson was sitting in front of her, few feet away and shirtless. The fan in her still hadn't disappeared. "About what?"




"That blonde girl from earlier?"


"No." Taylor sipped his o.j.


"Then who?"


Taylor swallowed the fruity liquid. "You don't know her so it won't matter."


"Is it that Skye girl? I know very few of your girlfriends names." Jaimee tried to stare into his bright blue eyes but he wouldn't make eye contact.


As a matter of fact, it is." Taylor paused. "And I only have one girlfriend." He eyed Jaimee.


"Oh so your girlfriend is Skye?" Jaimee pushed her long curls behind her ears.


"Yeah but I think she's cheating on me." Taylor stated uncomfortably.


Well, your cheating on her so...


"I am not." Taylor interrupted.


"Blonde girl? Alona?"


"Those are just ... dates."


"So then you making out with the Blonde is just a date?"


"Sort of, I guess."


Jaimee chuckled. "I can't believe your like this."


"Like what?" Taylor asked stubbornly.


"You use girls."


"Not as much anymore."


"But still. I would never have guessed in a million years.."


You won't tell the rest of the fans, right?


"No and please consider me a friend, not a fan or a stalker."


Taylor smiled. "All right. So what are you down here for?"




"I'll get you some." Taylor stood up and filled a glass with icy water from the fridge dispenser.


"Thanks." Jaimee took the glass from him as she admired everything from his feet up to his hair. He was so perfect. "Oh no, please don't say the old crush is coming back." She thought trying not to take so much interest in his every move.


"No problem. You probably wouldn't know where the water is anyway." Taylor laughed sitting back down.


"I think I could have guessed, the fridge." Jaimee chuckled taking a long gulp from her glass. She was hoping Taylor had some kind of feelings for her, any kind of feelings for her. At that moment Zac wasn't even a thought in her head.


"Didn't think Hanson fans could think." Taylor joked.


"Your dissing the fans? You wouldn't be famous if it wasn't for us, them"


"Exactly" Taylor thought. "Yeah whatever." He really didn't want to get into any deep conversations.


"Okay." Things were silent and Jaimee took pleasure in listening to Taylor's breathing. Even that seemed to need talent when he did it.


"Ya know, Zac really likes you."


Jaimee looked back up at Taylor about to say "Who's Zac?"  "Oh um, I like him to." Maybe she could play hard to get with Taylor and make him jealous. Yeah, that might work.


"You two are cute together even though your like my age."


"Was that a hint?" Jaimee wondered hinting back. "I really should be dating someone my own age."


"But love makes you do silly things, sometimes wrong things and the opposite works the same way."


"I don't think I'm IN love with Zac, maybe I just love him, ya know?"


"Yeah but sometimes you realize something when the persons gone or, or when they come back and it all changes... Just hearing their voice can make you change your mind about everything within seconds. It just, it can bring back old feelings and bring you to your senses and....." Taylor stopped talking and slowly stood up. "Excuse me, I have to call someone." He left the room after taking the portable from the cradle.


"What just went on here?" Jaimee asked herself. Taylor was just saying a bunch of things which were nothing relating to her and Zac. She decided to sit and wait for his return.


Taylor locked himself in the bathroom so that he could call Skye in private. The phone rang a few times and even though it was about 1:30AM he wished she would pick up. After the sixth ring he got a response.


"Hello?" Skye's younger brother Danny questioned as he picked up the phone.


"Hey, is Skye there?"


"Oh Marc! Man! I got the coolest new N64 game! A bunch of my friends are coming over to play it tomorrow after school so if you want you can come over too! I've been playing it the whole day! It's so addicting!"


"This isn't Marc." Taylor said rudely. First Skye thought he was Marc and now Danny. What, did he breath and talk like this guy?


"Oh sorry. Who is it then?" Danny asked confused.


"Who's Marc?"


"Um, my sisters boyfriend. Who are you?"


Taylor face turned red with rage. His heart literally broke in half. It was like millions of knives shot through him. There was no way to describe the pain he felt at that very second. Taylor choked back all his fury and sorrow. "Tell Skye, not that she'll care but that Taylor said he never wants to see her again and that... and that its over." Saying those last few words just added to Taylor's anguish. He hung up the phone throwing it against the tiles and watching it fall onto the floor in pieces. He cuddled himself into a little ball in the corner of the bathroom. Tears fell freely from his eyes. He hadn't cried over a girl since Rachel. He hated to cry but he couldn't stop. He called Skye to tell her how he loved her more then life and wanted to see her so badly it hurt but found out she really was cheating on him. Maybe he shouldn't have asked Danny who Marc was. Maybe he shouldn't have even called. He had never been hurt by a girl before. After all, who would cheat on him? He was Jordan Taylor Hanson, famous, pop star, teenage idol heartthrob. Who could possibly be any better then him? Who could possibly take the love of his life away from him? Who could hurt him so much? Taylor wiped the tears out of his eyes as he heard a knock on the bathroom door.


"I really have to go. Who's in there?!" He heard Isaac's voice.


Taylor stood up opening the door.


"Taylor, damn, are you okay?"


"Skye is cheating on me! How could I be okay?" Taylor needed his older brothers sympathy. For once he knew how it felt to be hurt by a girl. Isaac had faced it many times but Taylor never in his life had experienced it.


"I know and I'm sorry for you."


"You know?!" Taylor saw that Jaimee had just walked in from the kitchen but ignored her presence.


"I didn't want to tell you since you never told Skye that you cheated on her."


"How long have you known?!"


"I've known since we were in New York, a few days before I found out you fucked Alanna." Isaac stated calmly trying not to get upset over that little incident.


"You had sex with Alona?!" Jaimee cut in.


"No, not your Alona, A-L-A-N-N-A, Alanna." Isaac cleared up the puzzlement.


"How did you know I fucked Alanna?" Taylor whispered not wanting his parents to hear even though they were upstairs.


"Lets just say I knew, just the way I knew about Skye cheating on you."


"And how did you know that?"


"Tay... I really have to pee." Isaac walked past Taylor and into the bathroom avoiding any further comments.


"Fine Ike! Keep it to yourself!" Taylor shouted turning around.


"Taylor, are you okay?" Jaimee asked completely concerned. His peach like face was now red as sweat trickled down it... or maybe it was tears. Most likely tears because his eyes showed signs of crying.


"I'm fine. I'll be fine." Taylor sniffled, sounding more like he was telling himself these words of encouragement.


"I think we both need sleep. Things may look up in the morning." Jaimee smiled trying her best to cheer him up.


Taylor didn't say anything. He just marched upstairs to his room and into his top bunk. Laying there silently he didn't want to move his blankets onto himself. He didn't want to roll over into a comfortable position. He didn't even want to put on his shirt to keep the cold drafts of wind entering the room from freezing him. Chills ran down his spine as he thought about Skye kissing another guy and everything else they could have done together. Sure he cheated on Skye with Sandra, Angel, Alanna, Charity.... And maybe he even did think of breaking up with her but realizing who he had just lost made him want her more then ever. But maybe Skye deserved a guy who was always there for her, who would never cheat on her, someone who wasn't a complete jerk like he had been. Maybe she just deserved better.




It was Isaac again. What could he possibly want?. "What?"


"Skye knows about you and Alanna having sex. Alanna told her and then Skye told me over the phone. Alanna told me about the guy Skye was seeing over the phone as well. Alanna and Skye are friends now. And thats how I know."


"Skye knows?" Taylor asked quietly, still laying motionless on his back.


"Yes. Skye knows."


"Does she know about Charity?


"Not unless you told Alanna."


"You talked to Skye?" It was like a question and answer moment between Taylor and Isaac.


"A few times. She still loves you Taylor, but not as a boyfriend."


Tears filled Taylor's eyes again. "She said that?"


"Yes, in those exact words."


"Why didn't you tell me?"


"Because you had to find out from Skye yourself just like she should of found out about Alanna by you. You two were going out. That means you both had to play the roll of honesty which neither of you were doing."


Taylor hated the way Isaac said "were going out".  "So we both made mistakes. Do you think we will be able to fix them?"




"Yeah honestly."


"No. I think its over between you guys. You might like each other but neither of you care enough to be dedicated and faithful. It can't be love if you don't know that your in love without doubts every time you breath."


Taylor stayed quiet. He liked hearing Isaac's definition of love, something he had never known the real one to.


Isaac climbed into Taylor's bunk just like he did when they were kids. "When your in love, you can't think straight. It's like when that person is away from your distance, you feel like your a puzzle missing a piece. It's where you want to spend every second with that person 24/7 and can't picture ever losing them, cheating on them or hurting them. It's where you want to shower them with gifts and give them all of your attention and call them just to hear their voice. It's where you actually hear their voice when their gone. It's where you find all their flaws attractive and when you see them you hear music.... sweet music... It's a beautiful thing. Love has nothing to do with sex, Taylor. It has to do with.... love."


Taylor sat up. "So you don't think Skye and I were ever in love?"


"Yeah maybe you were, but it wasn't anything too amazing or you wouldn't have cheated on each other. Its hard to be in love when you are in a different state every week. Long distance relationships are hard."


"But I called her tonight, to tell her that I love and miss her."


"Then maybe you do love her. But if your in love with her then you would be positive of it unless it was some kind of blind love."


"How do you know so much about love?" Taylor asked, eye to eye with his brother.


"Because Taylor, when Ella came back, my puzzle piece came along with her."




11:54 PM

That morning Zac was the first one up. It was usually like that in the mornings only for a change he woke up pretty late. It was 10:00 and that was considered to be a delayed morning in the Hanson house, except for Isaac, that is. Zac hopped off his bed and pushed it under Isaac's. He noticed Jaimee sleeping and took the opportunity to stare at her. As he watched and listened to her little snores, he took her hand and held it. She was so sweet when she slept, just like an angel.


Jaimee felt warmth on her hand. It matched perfectly with the dream she was having of Taylor and her prancing along in a rose garden hand in hand. Or maybe not prancing... As Jaimee sighed she opened her eyes hoping it was him.


"Hi there sleeping beauty." Zac kissed Jaimee's forehead.


"Oh... Zac. Good morning." Jaimee suddenly felt guilty for all her thoughts about Taylor.


"How did you sleep last night?"


"Great." Jaimee grinned.


Zac thought about the conversation he overheard Isaac and Taylor talking about the night before. All the symptoms pointed to love. "Jaimee?"


"Yeah Zac?"


"I think I love you." He shyly confessed.


"Are you sure?" Jaimee was also remembering Taylor and Isaac's little talk.


"Yeah, I hear music when your near me... well it's Aerosmith music... but I hear it and um your in my puzzle."


Jaimee couldn't control her laughter even though it might not have been right for the situation. Isaac really made her think of how strong the word love is and how she should think before she said it. Uncontrollably it came out of her mouth. "I think I love you too, Zac."


Zac smiled changing the subject which he found a tad uncomfortable. "Wanna go to the farmers market for breakfast?"




"We're gonna have to rollerblade there. Did you bring your rollerblades?"


"Yep. I packed them."


"Okay so get changed and we'll go." Zac smirked once again.




"Zac!" Jaimee laughed as he grabbed her hand zooming off down the streets of T-town. So far their were no cars on the road.


Zac grabbed Jaimee's other hand and rollerbladed backwards with her facing him.


"Try not to get us run over!" Jaimee giggled.


"Tell me if there's a car comin."


"Hi Zac!" A female voice called from one of the houses on the block. "How's Taylor?"


"Hey Nikki! He's fine," Zac stopped rollerblading, still holding one of Jaimee's hands. He zoomed over to the girl who looked about fourteen.


"Has he mentioned me?"


"Urm.. um... yeah he has!"


"Oh my god! What did he say?!"


"He said he wants you to give back his jacket"


"Oh. Tell him to come over later."


"Sure dude! Cya!"


"Bye Zac!"


Zac and Jaimee continued to rollerblade when a girl on a bike stopped directly in their path almost knocking Jaimee onto the ground.


"Watch where your going Mar-gar-et!" Zac shouted.


"Oh what, your afraid I'll hit your stupid girlfriend!?"


"Oh that's mature Margo! Act like an asshole!"


"No Zac! Your the asshole! And I don't care about her!" Margaret gave Jaimee one of the meanest looks that could ever be given. "I hope she gets hit by a car and DIES!" Margaret yelled in a snooty voice.


"I hope you die Margo!" Zac defended Jaimee.


"You used to be my best friend Zac! Too bad your a total jerk now!"


"No, I'm lucky your not in my life anymore!"


"I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!" Margaret's words seemed to have a rhythm in them and they were more towards Jaimee then Zac, even though she looked at him when she said them.


"Could you just leave Zac alone?" Jaimee was fed up with Margaret's attitude even though she hardly knew her.


"NO! Zac's closer to me then he'll ever be to you!!" Margaret pushed Jaimee's shoulders with all her force.


Jaimee tried to catch control of her balance but slipped and fell backwards onto the ground. She plopped onto her butt as she protected her head with her arms. "Ow!!" She screamed.


Zac quickly bladed over to her. "Jaimee, are you okay?!"


"No, my ass hurts!"


Zac gave Jaimee his hands so that he could pull her up.


Jaimee hoped she didn't break anything. They really should invent butt pads but then again its not everyday a jealous twelve year old pushes you onto the ground when your rollerblading.


"Margo!!!!" Zac screamed at the top of his lungs still holding Jaimee so that she wouldn't fall.


"You can't do anything now Zac! You have to help your ugly girlfriend! But she's lucky! Next time something worse might happen!" With that warning, Margaret rode away on her bicycle.


"The girl with a lot of holes has a lot of problems too."


"Does it hurt a lot?" Zac asked Jaimee.


"Yeah, it does."


"Want me to kiss it and make it all better?"


"My ass?!" Jaimee laughed.


"Um.. sure, why not?!" Zac chuckled.


"I don't think so, Zac." She continued giggling.


"Do you still wanna go to the farmers market?"


"Right now, all I want is to sit down."


"The farmers markets a few miles away and we're closer to there then to the house so we mine as well go there and sit."


"Okay, just make sure I don't fall and that we don't run into anymore of you psycho friends."


"Sure." Zac smiled as they began rollerblading again.


When Zac and Jaimee got to the farmers market they took of their rollerblades and got onto the line grabbing two bagels and chocolate milks. After paying they went to sit on one of the benches in the shade of the little garden next to the shop. The scenery was beautiful. Their was a river with ducks and green grass with flowers growing everywhere. Before sitting next to Jaimee to enjoy breakfast, Zac picked a tiny tulip out of the ground and handed it to her. Jaimee smiled accepting it.


"When Tay, Ike and I came here once, we saw Garth Brooks" Zac told her, starting a conversation.


"Oh wow. Did you say hi?"


"Nah, he was alone and we figured he wanted his privacy as much as we wanted ours. He did notice us though."


"That was nice of you. I would have ran up to him for an autograph. Did he say hi?"


"Nope he just smiled. It was cool."


"Like a little musician to musician greeting, hehe."


"Yeah." Zac grinned. "Your hair is so... so ... pretty." Zac blushed.


"Thanks Zac. So is yours." Jaimee felt the tips of his hair. "It's so soft."


"I have hair dressers doing it like every week so it should be!" Zac laughed.


"Oh wow, I wish I could get my hair done that often."


"No you don't. Trust me. Fame sucks."


"It never seems like it sucks. I mean you have money, fans...."


"Betcha couldn't go on! We don't get the money till where eighteen, somethin like that and the fame can be very annoying at times. I mean you see how we can't even get into our hotel without having to say hi to a million fans.


"I guess so. Hey Zac?"




Why aren't you as hyper as the first time we went out?"


"Two reasons. One - I'm not nervous with you anymore and two - I didn't drink my chocolate milk yet!" Zac let out a cackle, one which Jaimee loved.


"You were nervous?"


"Only because.. don't tell anyone.. but I never really dated a girl before."


"Well your only twelve..."


"Almost thirteen!"


"Okay, almost thirteen." Jaimee laughed.


Zac started to eat his bagel when he noticed Jaimee staring at him. "What?" He asked before swallowing.


"There's much more interesting things you can eat out besides the bread of that bagel, Zac."


First Zac didn't understand what Jaimee was talking about but he quickly caught on. "I'm sure there is." Zac gulped putting down the bagel and returning the same sensual stare she was giving him.


Jaimee scooted closer to his side. A feeling she couldn't describe came over her as he touched her cheek with his smooth hand. It was a feeling of being complete, of being apart of Zac and of him being apart of her.


Zac tenderly kissed Jaimee's pink shaded lips. She lightly returned the kiss and both pulled away knowing that people around them would not appreciate seeing two teens go at it.


"Excuse me?" A small shy voice came from in front of them.


Zac and Jaimee looked up at the gorgous girl in front of him. She looked about sixteen and like a model. "Yeah?"


"I am really, really sorry to bother you but I'm kind of a fan and I sort of knew Taylor when I was younger. I was just wondering if I could get an autograph?" The girl held out her "Middle Of Nowhere" CD.


"Oh yeah sure." Zac took the CD and marker from her. "What's your name?"


"Brianna Pilate."


"Okay, are you a model or somethin?"


"Yeah I am." Brianna let out her long crimped blonde hair from behind her ears. "How'd you know?"


"Your really, really tall and super skinny. If you weren't a model then I was going to encourage you to go for it." Zac laughed.


"I'm only 5'10. That's not that tall and as for skinny, well, um, I don't think so." Brianna couldn't take a compliment well.


"Yeah it is." Zac laughed. "Geez, that's Taylor's height." Zac handed the now signed CD back to her. "And as for you not being skinny, yeah right!"


"Thank you" Brianna flashed a killer smile. "And I am so so sorry to bother you."


"It's cool. Don't apologize" Zac noticed how Brianna's glistening light blue eyes beamed. They were almost like Taylor's only a lot lighter. They seemed more white then blue and were amazing. Zac felt like he could look into them forever and be enveloped in the wintery color.


"Okay thanks bye."


"C-ya." Zac waved and then turned his attention back to Jaimee.


"She was nice." Jaimee tried to hide the hint of jealousy she had towards Zac looking Brianna up and down.


"Yeah, if you like those skinny anorexic bitches."


"So do you?"


"Do I what?"


"Like those skinny anorexic bitches?"


"No, I like you and only you. Besides, Taylor is more the type to fall for a girl like that. If he ever meets her again, you can bet he'll do his share of coaxing to get her in bed with him unless he already did."


"She seems so sweet and pure. I don't think she'd do it."


"You'd be surprised what Tay can get girls to do, pretty much anything."


"But he really loves, loved that Skye girl"


"Those two were bound to break up. Taylor can't be a boyfriend no matter how hard he tries."


"Taylor was heartsick about that last night."


"I just hope he doesn't go back to fucking twelve girls a week. I hated that."


"Did you catch him in bed with them or something?"


"Yeah a few times. One girl tried to get me to join in and I was like "this isn't you little fanfic Hanson orgy fantasy here!". Another time he had like three naked chicks all over him. I was so grossed out!"


"Oh god..." Jaimee laughed.


Zac looked at his watch. Whoa, it's one already."


What are we going to do for the rest of the day?"


"We could hang around the house but tonight we have to go this church thing. You don't mind that, do you?"


"No, course not but I am jewish."


Well, you don't have to listen, just pretend you are. So wanna get going?"


"I guess so."


"How's your butt?


"Haha, better Zac."


"Okay then lets go." Zac strapped on his blades, Jaimee doing the same as they rode off back to the Hanson house.




Taylor sat in the hammock outside of the house thinking. He thought about how Skye always loved to rock on it. Whenever he hadn't been there, she would be on it. If he could take back that week she was in Tulsa he would spend every second talking to her, showering her with kisses and giving her flowers. But it was over and he was going to have to let things be. As he closed his eyes a warm wind flew over him. This was his new favorite place to relax in the Hanson houses backyard instead of underneath the old tree.




Taylor looked up at Isaac who was holding the portable which Walker managed to put back together. "Yeah?"


"First of all. Stop crying. Second, be calm with her. She's willing to talk things out. It's really your only chance."


Taylor took the phone from Isaac as he left. "Hello?"




"Skye?" Taylor sat up in the hammock.








It was suddenly quiet. The quietness wasn't uncomfortable, more like nice. Maybe it was better if neither of them said anything.... too late.


"Um well, I like Marc, a lot and..."


"I know, we broke up already. We don't have to do it again." Taylor cut her off, wanting least to hear the rest.


"No, let me finish."




"And I like you a lot.."


"Yeah, like.." Taylor was beginning to hate the word almost as much as love.


"There's a difference between you two though."


"Go on.."


"Marc, well he's romantic. He buys me roses, and flirts. He's always here for me when I need him. And well you... your a lot of fun but... but the only thing you want from me is sex and your always away. Marc just respects me more."


"That isn't true. I want to change for you. I don't only like you, I love you. Remember, you love me. We love each other and I can't live without you in my life. Remember all of that? I'm sorry I'm not around but you know the reasons. Why do you want to hurt me, Skye?"


"No Taylor. You hurt me. I did love you but you hurt me. If you really couldn't live without me then you would have told the fans how in love you really are."


Taylor could hear Skye starting to cry. "I can't let people know I have a girlfriend until our contract is over. Besides you went behind my back with Marc and didn't tell me. That hurt me more then I could ever hurt you."


"And what about you and Alanna? You never shared that information with me."


"Okay fine! We both made mistakes but why can't we just get past them like we've always done and be together?"


"Because we both found someone else."


"You might of found that Marc guy but Alanna and I are not together, and we don't plan to be!"


"She likes you, Tay."


"So? Millions of girls do! But out of the millions I only want you."


"That was probably the sweetest thing you've ever told me, which is sad. I'm sorry Taylor."


"Skye, remember that night at the river? The anniversary of Rachel's death?"




"I asked you if you would leave me and you said no."


Skye remembered the night perfectly :::: "Your never going to leave me right?" -"No Tay, never!" - "Good because I need you" - "I need you too." :::: "Taylor... things change. That was awhile ago."


"No Skye. You don't understand. That night we made a huge commitment to each other. I remembered it only because it was so important to me. Your such a huge part of my life Skye, you are my life." Taylor was now speaking words from his heart. "Even though you may not need me, I still need you."


"Taylor, you said it last night. You said it was over and it is. Lets not try to change things."


"Please Skye. I love you! I was just mad last night. I even wrote a song about you! Where going to sing it on our next tour and record it and..."


"I'm sorry, Taylor!" Skye just about broke into tears. She wanted to change her mind but knew for the sake of herself and Marc that she just couldn't give Taylor another chance.


"Can I see you again? One last time. Just to say good-bye for good?"


"Is that really necessary?" The last thing Skye wanted was to see Taylor again and get back all her feelings for him.


"Yes, please?"


"When are you coming to New York?


"Friday night. That's three days"


"So, Saturday at about six in front of your hotel?"


"Yeah, great, fine, good. Just don't bring Marc."


"Okay but don't think this is going to change my mind about things." Skye warned.


"I don't."


"Okay, bye."


"Yeah, c-ya Saturday." Taylor hung up knowing he could get Skye back if he saw her in person. She wouldn't be able to resist and would most definitely want him more then Marc.

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